February 23, 2006

  • Lullaby
    Hush my love now
    don't you cry
    Everything will be all right
    Close your eyes and drift in dream
    Rest in peaceful sleep


    If there's one thing I hope
    I showed you
    Hope I showed you

    Just give love to all


    Oh my love in my arms tight
    Every day you give me life
    As I drift off to your world
    We'll rest in peaceful sleep


    I know there's one thing that
    You showed me
    That you showed me


    Just give love to all
    Let's give love to all....


    The song is by Creed... and it goes out to Jm and Rk... mostly to Rk because he and i live it, but Jm needs it too...


    After more than 31 years, Jm and Bj are calling it quits.  more a matter of inertia, it seems than discord. it is hard to fight complacency unless we make it a priority.  when i was about 12, i decided that i wanted my tombstone to read, at the very least, "she was never boring", and so with that in mind, i have (mostly) kept complacency at bay.


    But how do you fight complacency in a marriage when one of you is too tired/overwhelmed/depressed to change, or to even see the need to change?


    i knew that we were getting stale afer only 7 years, and so i started to wear hotter clothes, and makeup, and do little sexy things... sometimes Donathan noticed, sometimes not, but I felt better -- less mousey and boring.  but donathan doesn't want to change or do, and so i can see Bj's point.  no matter how much i love Jm, he likes his orderly routine, and values that.  if you crave excitement, then you had best go make your own, and come back to Jm's calm space, and bring some of the craziness back with you... hopefully he will embrace that.


    that is what i hope for me and donathan... but i guess it didn't work for Jm and Bj.  i hope they can dissolve this amicably and let each other keep what is important, not snatching things up because the other person wants them...


    "Behold, I am doing a new thing..."


    and to the one with whom i share the music and , many many