February 3, 2005







  • perhaps the hardest thing i have ever done at my job was to remain completely in the present during the two meetings i had today with my boss...all of the signs read that she would be out for blood, but i decided that if i am ever going to practice what Eckhart Tolle preaches i need to start doing, not just 'believing'...and so i did not anticipate, or prepare ahead...i let what she had to say be said, and then i responded to what was actually going on...trying to stay in the moment...


    my first self-preserving instinct is to lie. prevaricate. circle the wagons and raise the drawbridge. curl into a ball and protect the underbelly....not this time.


    she wins when i compromise myself, my integrity.  what's the worst she can do? fire my ass? then i can collect while i apply to seminary. sounds like a plan.